Dating an autistic girl
I categorize people in relation to me, sometimes in highly-questionable ways — for instance, I notice that my bullies somehow made it into the “friendly acquaintance” or “friend” lists of my teen years.When I started college, I didn’t have any dating experience. I ended up having a “boyfriend” for three weeks freshman year, counting the five-day Thanksgiving vacation. My reasoning was, “Nobody else will ever want me anyway, so if somebody shows interest, jump in.” It was a “relationship”, if you can call it that, for the sake of having a relationship — all surface.In high school, I used graph paper to chart the people I knew: were they “friendly acquaintances,” “friends,” or “close friends”?I’ve turned to my journal, my therapists, and my family members to share my rational reasoning behind feelings and social life. He was just a fifth grader who was also in the church choir. It’s just the way I am, part and parcel of my autism spectrum disorder (ASD). ’ I went out, crying.” “Philip the Bad” wasn’t my friend, much less a grade-school love. I do my best to tread them and I think I have the important parts down pat, like how to love people and be kind to them, but the subtleties of body language, the knowledge of appropriate responses, and the idea of being in touch with my feelings escapes me.After extensive data interpretation, journaling, and mulling over, I can understand body language.Flirting, though, is fast-paced, occurring in moments dripping with subtext.
If I don’t understand people from the social perspective, then I analyze them intellectually.
If you were getting attached to someone and they had something big like that hidden away, wouldn't that make you distrust them a bit? But the fact is, for some men, dating a woman with a disabled kid that might be living with her through his adulthood would be a deal-breaker.
Hannah Brown, author of "If I Could Tell You" (a book about raising children with autism) talks about how different it is being a single woman with a special needs kid in her article "Divorce After Autism: Going It Alone." Like Hannah, I'm sure there are plenty of custodial autism Dads out there. I have met and do know a large amount of single autism moms, though, and we all face unique challenges when we try to date.
All of the eyes I thought were giving me the come-hither look!
How utterly inconvenient for me to read certain sexy eyes as aggravated.
A rule-obsessed, serious child, I told a grown-up that he was bothering me because I felt rather harassed. I took a face-reading test — basically you look at a series of photographs of eyes and choose the multiple-choice answer that corresponds with what the eyes emote.